As of late I have become increasingly aware of how much I cry. And it's not about big or important things. No, I cry over really insignificant and stupid things. For example...
Bears
It started when I watched a movie with my family about eight years ago. In the first ten minutes a bear was shot, and I burst into tears. For some reason, it was just too sad for my eleven-year-old heart. And it hasn't gotten better. Last year for my English class I had to watch a documentary called Grizzly Man about a man who lived with and studied bears in the wild until one killed him. I wasn't upset when he died (kind of saw that coming). But when two of the bears got in a fight and started ripping each other apart, I started crying again.
Old People
I'm not sure when this one started, but it's pretty serious. When I watched The Notebook for the first time I didn't cry when Allie left Noah (twice) or when they finally got back together. But I bawled during the last few scenes of the old couple in the nursing home.
I also sobbed after the first ten minutes of the movie UP. I thought the whole movie was going to be about Ellie and Carl and their life together exploring the world. I was sorely disappointed when--after a montage of picnics and jars of change and colorfully painted houses and old armchairs--Ellie died. I couldn't handle the fact that Carl was going to be so alone(until he met a boy scout and a talking dog, I guess).
This summer I worked (briefly) at the local grocery store. I saw a lot of people wandering in and out of the cluttered aisles. One day I was kneeling putting away lightbulbs on the shelves directly across from the juice refrigerator. I saw an old couple hobbling around, checking things off their small grocery list. At one point the woman left the cart to grab something she had forgotten in another aisle. I watched the old man as he looked up and down the drinks, picked up a carton of pulp-less orange juice, and smiled excitedly and contently as he placed it delicately in the cart. And, yes, I started crying. I have no idea why.
Pollution
A few weeks ago, BYU started construction on the entrance to the SWKT (for those of you who don't know what that is, it doesn't really matter--it's just the tallest building on campus). I walk by it almost every day: on my way to Physics in the morning; between my Book of Mormon, Humanities, and Portuguese classes; and again on my way home at the end of the day. And every time I walked by I got a whiff of the sweet aroma of construction. I don't know what it actually was that made the air smell that particular way, but whatever it was, it reminded me of São Paulo. I've heard that smell is one of the most memory-stimulating senses. And now I believe it, because the first time that poignant and almost sickening scent reached my nose, I was immediately taken back to my childhood and the pollution over that great and chaotic city. And I cried a little bit.
Era Uma Vez
This semester I am taking an intermediate level Portuguese class. As part of the curriculum, we were required to watch a couple Brazilian movies to work on our aural skills and comprehension. One of the movies was called Era Uma Vez. The English title is Once Upon a Time in Rio. Basically, it is a Romeo and Juliet story wherein a rich girl from Ipanema falls in love with a poverty-stricken young man who lives in the morro (slum) on the other side of the city. As they battle social norms, disapproving fathers, drug trafficking, and the heartache of forbidden love, these two young people act as a lens through which you get a glimpse of a tragic aspect of Brazilian culture: the favelas. At the end of the film, pretty much every main character dies (... like in Romeo and Juliet). The final shot pans over the dead lovers lying on the black and white mosaic sidewalks of Rio and ends framing a stunning, but slightly melancholy, ocean view. When I finished watching the movie, I was so angry. I started ranting to my roommates, and then all of a sudden I shouted, furiously, "Guys, I'm crying!' They didn't really believe me (understandably), but then I started sobbing and couldn't stop the rest of night. I went to bed sniveling, holding back the incessant flow of tears.
Katy Perry
I don't even like Katy Perry. BUT one day I decided to watch her music video Thinking of You. I have no idea what prompted me to do so, but the 1940's setting, lovely cinematography, and absolutely gorgeous co-star got me hooked. As the video went on, I started falling more and more in love with the fetching young soldier. And then, at the end, Katy Perry receives a telegram, and I started crying so hard I was excruciatingly embarrassed. Watch it and you'll understand.
And last, but not least...
Pumpkins
This is by far the worst. When my parents came to visit in October, they took my roommates and I to the grocery store and bought us three beautiful pumpkins to put on our doorstep. They were some of the most perfect (and the heaviest) pumpkins I've ever seen. I loved them. And then one day I looked out the window and saw the maintenance workers hauling our pumpkins away. I ran out (dramatically) and asked why they were taking them. After a long conversation (...argument) about the difference between carved and uncarved pumpkins, apartment regulations, fines, and other boring but traumatic things, I finally got them to agree to leave the pumpkins. As soon as I walked in the door, I started bawling because I was afraid of losing my festive squash.
